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My dear Jil, I know you guys are far away in Manchester. Maybe we’ll see when I go up to Sheffield. But the English December weather is not exactly my thing at this time of the year. I prefer Miami, Florida. But let me explain it to you, to show you where couples get it wrong.  Continue reading

My dear Jack, you have to be careful about emotional abandonment. It may spell doom to your marriage. You can’t afford to emotionally neglect your wife. It’s consequential.  Continue reading

Dear Jack, but I thought I had explained this to you before. You’ve written me about it. For clarity let me state it again: it is good to marry in church but it is not compulsory. Continue reading

My dear Jil, the problem sometimes is that we think successful relationships are auto-regulated. Nothing could be farther from the truth and such notions are a mirage. It explains why it seems people are expecting in relationships and not giving. They expect things to happen to them and so the relationship becomes one-sided, one party doing the giving. As long as the other party is putting effort into the relationship, the relationship will seemingly work; until the counter-party begins to expect some reciprocity for all his investment, emotional and material. Continue reading

My dear Jil, the problem sometimes is that we’re so focused on our wedding objective we lose sight of the marriage. So determined are you to marry this guy you’re not thinking of the viability of the marriage. You’re focused on momentous victory, not what lies beyond the “victory”. Such “victory” can only be pyrrhic. Continue reading

Dear Jack, there just comes a point you must say to yourself, “You know what, I’m done with womanizing!” You say to yourself, “I’m done, and I’m just going to face my wife and marriage.” Then you’ll discover the liberty and emotional depth in your marriage.  Continue reading

My dear Mary, you’ll break your marriage eventually if you keep pursuing the current sexual policy in your marriage. Of course that’s not what you want but if your marriage breaks, your intention is a moot issue. A lack of intendment is irrelevant if we start playing with fire and end up arsonous.  Continue reading

My dear Jack, the average young man will pass through four stages in life post-graduation. By average I’m not talking about a young dude from a very rich home. He’s not an average young man. I’m talking about the young man born without a spoon – silver or wooden. Or without fork and knife. He needs to buy. He’ll struggle at the beginning as he strives to make it in life. He’s got to be driven if he wants to succeed. His relationship dynamics will follow the cadence of his historicity from stage to stage.  Continue reading

Dear Jack, there’s that mistaken belief marriage is a one-way traffic system, not a two-lane highway. If you stick to that erroneous belief and start exercising one-sided faith in your relationship, your emotions will be at risk. Continue reading

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