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All Letters

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My dear Jack, you’re letting your hormones decide for you, and you’re going to make a mistake. Of course sexual attraction matters in a relationship. But it’s not the all and be all. There are other things to consider. Character matters. And so does temperament. And cultural values – things like taste, exposure, knowledge… The key is to have a balance. That balance is an aggregation of critical factors like character as well as custom factors. “I like a woman who sings and looks like Adele” is a custom factor for example. It’s a peculiar desire. Continue reading

My dear Jil, I did warn you about this guy. Wish you’d listened to me. The guy doesn’t love you. He just wanted to use you, and you knew that. Funny I spend more time trying to dissuade young people from making ruinous marital decisions than on any other issue. If I were you I’ll proceed to church to do thanksgiving it didn’t work out. Stop crying. God delivered you. Of course it’s a painful thing to have a crashed relationship. Unless you weren’t invested. Hope deferred makes the heart sick. Continue reading

My dear Jack, let me give you a simple guidance system for your marriage. I know there are so many rules on how to love a woman, so much so the rules rival the Book of Deuteronomy. But love is supposed to be quite natural. Continue reading

*A VALENTINE SPECIAL FOR MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE

My very own Jil, I was in church yesterday and the minister preached on gratitude. (I know you couldn’t attend). In order to make us appreciative of God’s graciousness, the minister asked us to list five things we’re thankful for. Continue reading

My dear Jack, but you’re not going to marry her mother or sister! You’re going to marry her, not her family. If she’s critically deficient in character the goodness of her family can’t save the marriage. Neither her mum nor sister is going to live with you. 

Continue reading

My dear Jil, was so nice meeting you in Houston! We were glad – wife and I. Told you you’ll overcome! Given all you’ve been through you can legitimately claim to be a conqueror. You can’t give up on your singing. You’ve got to keep at it. You’re a beautiful and talented singer! It’s important you sing so you feel fulfilled using your talent. Continue reading

Dear Jack, I think you should avoid the temptation of compulsive dating. I understand the loneliness thing. It’s nice to have someone you can call your own, someone you can go out with. There’s just that thing about showing up at a social event with a partner.

Continue reading

 Dear Jil, in my last mail I forgot to tell you about their marriage. I mean the marriage of the couple I spoke to you about. Their home is relentlessly filled with happiness. There’s a lightness and airiness to that home. It’s as a home should be.

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Dear Jack, thank you for the present you sent over the hols. I’m most appreciative. Thank you. Just returned from vac. Well, it’s another year. We grow older each and every year. May we grow in wisdom! If there’s nothing you pray for this year it’s wisdom. Continue reading

My dear Jil, it’s a brand new year, and the year is so full of promise. Sorry I couldn’t answer your mail over the hols. I was away. Trying to catch up on my mails. There’s a ton in my box. Continue reading

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