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Tag Archives: bad marriage

My dear Jil, this is not marriage. Whatever it is you have violates the essence of marriage. Is a bed of nails really a bed? Yes, it looks like one but can it support comfortable sleep? One might as well sleep on the floor. It will be more comfortable. Only an Indian mystic will fancy a bed of nails; but even for him it will be more about proving a point, and for a short period of time. No mystic permanently sleeps on a bed of nails. Continue reading

My dear Jil, if there’s a prayer every father should pray for his daughter, it is, “May you not know a bad marriage.” The trauma of a bad marriage is unimaginable. And there are different layers to that trauma. Continue reading

Dear Jack, I do hope you don’t mind the truth, ‘cause I’m going to say some very hard truth in this letter. Think of a fluffy whiff of cloud hanging between heaven and earth. That’s how your life is right now. You’re just hung there, not moving forward or backward – Just an eccentric piece of the mechanical vagaries nature. There’s a form to your marriage, just like the cloud. Yet the marriage has no form. Continue reading

Dear Jack, if you study the pattern of my missives you’ll discover two things: One, I’m trying to make sure that subsisting marriages work out, that they’re imbued with love, joy and happiness. But more critically, I’m trying to prevent intending marriages from becoming incubators of pain and sorrow. A bad marriage starts with a wrong choice of partner. And such partners are not necessarily bad people. They may just be bad for each other. When partners don’t gel, or come from incongruent dimensions, it can lead to disinterest and frustration. And a marriage created in the crucible of compulsion is a recipe for disaster and unhappiness.  Continue reading