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Tag Archives: Values

My dear Jil, you’re thinking short term but when it comes to marriage you have to think long term.

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There are what we call invisible losses in life. These are losses we sustain without even being aware. The way life is structured a great deal of the value we derive is hidden in others. Therefore what they think of us matters. Call it social credit.

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Dear Jack, the young man I spoke to you about… He gave me the letter his father wrote him. Was in the probate envelope. Very touching letter. I’ve asked for permission to share it with you: “My dear son, a good father prays that his son be greater than him. May you be greater than your father. May your father’s accomplishments pale in comparison to what you’ll achieve in life. Your father’s achievements only portend the scale of your accomplishment. May you be eminent. Continue reading

My dear Jack, I think I’ve told you this before, not sure… Life has secret corridors. Life is a virtual reality geography, and unfortunately we don’t have a map. All we have are certain coordinates to well worn paths. Nobody has a map of the terrain of life. Continue reading

Dear Jack, if you study the pattern of my missives you’ll discover two things: One, I’m trying to make sure that subsisting marriages work out, that they’re imbued with love, joy and happiness. But more critically, I’m trying to prevent intending marriages from becoming incubators of pain and sorrow. A bad marriage starts with a wrong choice of partner. And such partners are not necessarily bad people. They may just be bad for each other. When partners don’t gel, or come from incongruent dimensions, it can lead to disinterest and frustration. And a marriage created in the crucible of compulsion is a recipe for disaster and unhappiness.  Continue reading

Dear Jack, I want you to take a sheet of paper and draw three circles. In the first circle write “Vocation”. In the second write “Relationship”. In the third write “God”. Those are the three circles you need to mind if you want all round success. Continue reading

Dear Jil,Thank you for your mail. And I appreciate your kind compliments. Yes, my letters are REAL!

Now in your mail you stated that you subscribe to the Biblical injunction of no premarital sex. That is okay even if you’re judged prude or old fashioned. It’s your choice and you should never apologise for your values. In view of your upcoming nuptials however (it’s barely a month away), you do need to know how to fulfill your sexual marital obligation. Sex is a knowledge program. It’s why we call it carnal knowledge. Even the Bible refers to sex as knowledge. Copulation is recorded as a “knowing” in several passages. One of such instances is Genesis 4.1: “Adam knew Eve his wife”. It’s referring to coition. A more modern translation would read “Adam had sex with Eve his wife”. So sex is not “unholy”. God created the biological implements of sex – conceptualised copulation for marriage.

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My dear Jackson,

I asked your brother Jack to deliver this letter because I’ll be away all week. We’ll talk when I’m back. You raised certain issues in your letter. I think it all boils down to self esteem – what you think of yourself. Give it a few years and you’ll realise those “cool” guys you spoke about are operating on a false definition.

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My dear Jack,

It’s another weekend and as is my custom, I’m writing you a thought. My topic today is the subject of loyalty. It’s not something you find in abundance today but it’s a value you must hold dear.

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