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Read Letter

Valentine Jack

My dear Jack, tomorrow is Valentine. Time to prove your love and mettle. All those sweet things, and all those imagining – ¦time to prove them. Tomorrow is a verb not a noun. In the competitive department, Valentine means a lot to ladies. Everyone in the office checks out what each person received. It’s a time for one-upmanship for ladies – a sort of my gift is richer and bigger than yours undeclared competition. It’s also when ladies assess the quality of love a man has. And that’s measured in effort and gift quality.

For some ladies however it’s a time to cry and feel sad, about that clueless boyfriend or that stingy one. A clueless or stingy boyfriend can quickly turn Valentine into a day of misery. In other words, Valentine is a referendum on relationships. It’s when long lasting impressions are formulated. Therefore you can’t have a no-show tomorrow. You’ll be jeopardizing your relationship. You’ll turn your girlfriend into a talking point among her peers. Girls talk about these things. It’s important therefore that you carefully think and strategize if you want to marry her. If you lack knowledge in this regard you better get advisers. In a multitude of counsel there’s safety. But don’t take gift advice from someone jealous of your girlfriend. She’ll compromise your expression of love.

In this letter I’ll give you some tips, useful and practical tips. Your girlfriend is the classical romance type. Therefore flowers will mean a lot to her. Roses are traditional – red roses, though you can be different and choose white roses, or other flowers. You may consider flowers in her colours. I’m assuming of course you know her colours. If you take such a route you must let her know somehow, lest she thinks it’s because you can’t afford roses. Your name is not Kanye, so I don’t expect you to go over the top. Besides you don’t have Kanye’s money. The key question then is, how do you maximize your spend to deliver value and prove your valour?

Let’s start with the card. The card must express loving sentiments. You only get to formally express those sentiments three times a year – her birthday, yuletide and Valentine. Make it count. And by the way those are three budgetary heads for gifts in a year. Don’t get into all that it’s the thought that counts stuff. A smart broke guy wrote that. Ladies don’t believe in that it’s the thought that counts stuff. It’s the gift that counts! And all those religious folks who deem women who love gifts materialistic are reading a different version of the Bible. Didn’t Solomon tell us kindness makes a man attractive? You better buy her a gift!

Anyway – where were we? Oh yes, we were talking about the card. If one card won’t adequately express your emotions, buy multiple card…two, three. It’s important the card is authentic though. It’s important you mean the words, or it will sound contrived. And if the cards are lacking in capacity to express your feelings, compose your own words. You don’t have to be a poet. All you need is pen of truth and the ink of sincerity. Say it as it is. You must be generous with emotion on Valentine. That’s the whole idea of dedicating a whole day to love. February 14 is just not the same as February 15. Don’t miss that day!

A gift can be as simple as a bottle of perfume, though that may be lazy. She’ll value your gift more if she knows you put a lot of thought and effort into it. And you can give multiple gifts. The more the gifts actually, the better. Ask any lady! Remember all the ladies are checking out each other’s gifts. Imagine everyone receiving gifts and you don’t have any. That’s how bad it feels. And never mind that this Val falls on a weekend this year. There’ll still be a UN mandated session about the weekend on Monday in the office, trust me! So get her a good gift. Is there something she’s been mentioning she likes? Is there something she wistfully wishes for? If you’re doing fashion items it’s wise to consult women on the latest trends. We’re not all gifted in that department. Whatever you do however, note that the wrapping of the gift is as important as the gift itself. Presentation matters. If you’ve bought an expensive gift it makes sense to present it expensively. Buy nice wrapping paper and ribbon. Get it beautifully wrapped. The store should help. It will however be incongruous if the quality of wrapping is greater than the gift. That’s articulation of false hope! The gift must not be under presented either. There’s a right balance somewhere.

Of course you should plan to take her for dinner. Venue depends on how much you have. Though like I said, don’t do more than your means, but do the best with your means for her. The more effort you make the more she reads you value her. Love is not cheap. It entails giving. I’m just saying if you value her, show it. Love is a verb. If you’re stingy to her, you may lose her to a generous guy. Stuff happens! Love entails sacrifice. If you’re counting pennies, you’ll miss wonderful opportunities to express love and affection. She shouldn’t be wrestling affection out of you. Not if you love her. Affection shouldn’t be squeezed from you. Better to lay a track record of generosity in your relationship. Love is generous, not stingy of heart. Everyone is waiting to see what you’ll do tomorrow. Make tomorrow count!

Your mentor, LA

© Leke Alder


Tags : Gifts, Valentine's Day

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