My dear Jack, there are two capacities you must develop if you want to make a success of your relationship and indeed life. You must develop capacity for introspection and capacity for critical self-analysis. The two are not the same. By introspection I mean the ability to look inward, to consider your life, your direction; to see where you’re coming from, know where you are, where you want to go. It’s a meditative exercise, sort of. Doesn’t mean you have to lock up yourself in a room cross legged, breathing methodically. It’s just having some quiet in your inner self, seeing things through your inner eyes. It’s not meant to be a pity party either. Introspection is neutral in emotion. It’s not about feeling sorry for yourself. It’s simply looking inside. Introspection allows us to see the need for a plan. It doesn’t come up with the plan but it will give you an awareness of the need for a plan. Planning requires rational energy. That’s not the energy employed by introspection. It uses a different form of energy. Introspection doesn’t sweat. It has a coolant.

