Letter to Jack

My dear Jack, you’ve got to rekindle the romance in your marriage. Romance is a conscious thing. It’s not a mood that descends on you at full moon. You’re not a wolf.

Childbirth does have an effect on women in ways men can’t imagine. Creates physiognomic distortion. And some women suffer mentally – Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Giving birth is traumatic. Many women develop permanent marks from childbirth. Some stretch marks don’t erase. Stretch marks depend on heredity. They occur when the collagen and elastin in the skin stretch beyond snapping back.

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WARNING: SOME EXPLICIT CONTENT

Dear Jack, of course physical attraction matters in a relationship. Life is not generic. We all have our taste. Don’t listen to those who over-spiritualise relationship. They’ll spiritualise Pure Water. Attraction matters! It’s dangerous to marry someone you’re not attracted to. You’ll set yourself up for sexual frustration.

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Dear Jack, a smile flitted across my face as I read your mail. The conundrum you’re facing is what I call the Vanity-Charity syndrome: do you date your vanity or date love? Or as you put it, there’s this medical doctor… and there’s this other girl who’s not a medical doctor. Who should you date? And while some will scoff at your question, the truth is, it’s an issue young men are often confronted with.

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Dear Jack,

Here’s a story I came across some weeks ago. Contains serious lessons. Happy reading!

“He sat face to face with the Counsellor. The session took place in the counsellor’s study. He sat in a parson chair, the Counsellor in a velvety blue Poet’s accent chair. The room was rugged, very comfortable. An oak wooden desk occupied some real estate. It sported a table lamp. The furnishing suggested a rigorous attempt at insouciance to the world with all its noise. He was a bit fidgety. Continue reading →

Dear Jack,

How do you know she’s the one? Aside other parameters there’s also gut feeling! Difficult to explain but read this story: Continue reading →

Dear Jack,

Homer Simpson is a very famous man. As famous as any man can be. He, of the television cartoon series The Simpsons, has been described as one of the most influential TV characters. We hear women use the expression, “D’oh” but we don’t realize it’s from Homer. The word is now in Oxford Dictionary.
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Dear Jack,

I’m sorry I can’t tell you what to do. This is in line with my belief that a man should make his own marital decisions. I can give you guidelines, help you analyse issues, but you must take your own decision. You can shop around for clarity but you can’t shop around for a decision. Continue reading →

Dear Jack, I’ve sometimes wondered why marriage is so powerful. Marriage is such a powerful institution! I’m not sure the average young man or woman knows how powerful marriage is – how very consequential marital decisions are. No one goes into marriage and remains the same. It’s impossible. It has such power!

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Dear Jack, I honestly don’t get it. You fell in love with this lovely girl. You’ve dated her for years now and thinking of marriage. And then your mum “took her name” to the Pastor who “examined the matter” spiritually and declared the marriage accursed.

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Dear Jack, let me tell you about an athlete of renown. No, he’s not Usain Bolt, Ed Moses or Hicham El Guerrouj of Morocco; or any of the ones the Press tout. He’s not known in Olympic circles. Never enters competitive sports. But he’s a great athlete. I’m talking about none other than Akeem Gomez. I’m sure you don’t know him. I didn’t too until I began to do research for some stuff I was working on. As I googled my brain his name dropped.

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