Romance

Dear Jack, a marriage can quickly become stale as a couple “settles down.” Anything stale and mouldy can’t be good. As with bread so is marriage. Yes, the courtship stage is over but it’s important to keep the momentum in marriage, even if it’s not exactly same quality. Life can be terribly busy but you have to create special occasions. You have to enjoy yourselves as a couple. Life will never end. It just keeps going and it will outlast you. You can’t overtake life. So sometimes, it’s best to get off the bus as a couple, get away from the chores of life and enjoy yourselves. The responsibilities of life never end. You have to create space to be a couple. It can be anything from going to the movies, to going for a drink together, to going to an informal party or hosting one.
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Dear Jil, your ex can’t be looming in the background of your marriage like a recalcitrant demon. Your ex can’t be featuring in your marriage like some malodorous atmosphere. You’re going to break your marriage. You’ve got to learn to let go of your past relationship. It’s gone. You’re married now, to another man. You’re just going to bring complications into your marriage hanging on to your ex. Continue reading →

*A VALENTINE SPECIAL FOR MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE

My very own Jil, I was in church yesterday and the minister preached on gratitude. (I know you couldn’t attend). In order to make us appreciative of God’s graciousness, the minister asked us to list five things we’re thankful for. Continue reading →

Dear Jack, the thing about marriage is that it’s easy to just “settle in”. It’s easy for a marriage to become something quotidian – a routine exercise of life, something we do mindlessly. Continue reading →

My dear Jil, the chemistry you want in your marriage doesn’t come cheap. It takes effort. There are two phases of a relationship. There’s the attraction phase and there’s the maintenance phase. The adrenalin in the attraction phase constitutes a magnetic quantity that keeps a relationship cemented. But that phase will come to an end at some point. Then begins the maintenance phase and thence people struggle. Relationships need refreshment and they need maintenance. Continue reading →

My dear Jack, tomorrow is Valentine. Time to prove your love and mettle. All those sweet things, and all those imagining – ¦time to prove them. Tomorrow is a verb not a noun. In the competitive department, Valentine means a lot to ladies. Everyone in the office checks out what each person received. It’s a time for one-upmanship for ladies – a sort of my gift is richer and bigger than yours undeclared competition. It’s also when ladies assess the quality of love a man has. And that’s measured in effort and gift quality. Continue reading →

This Valentine edition of #Letr2Jil is dedicated to my beautiful Jil, my wife, my soul mate and one true love!

He turned to CHAPTER 4 of the book, flipped the page forth, and then back, and began to read:

My very own Jil, I sat up in the middle of the night watching you sleep, my heart a-wonder. I looked at your face. Continue reading →

My dear Jack, you have to be careful about emotional abandonment. It may spell doom to your marriage. You can’t afford to emotionally neglect your wife. It’s consequential.  Continue reading →

Dear Jack, it’s not enough to love someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, you must like her as well. Liking is the basis of friendship – the loving to spend time with that someone who makes you happy. Continue reading →

The letter floated ashore, preserved in a plastic case – debris from the ill-fated plane crash on the Adriatic Ocean. It was a love letter from a man to his wife. She apparently carried it with her on her journey, among other mementos. There were 80th anniversary birthday cards in that plastic box. Some had children scrawls. “Happi BathDaY GrAMa,” one read cheerfully. “When are yOu bakin My choclat caKe?” The Adriatic being the northernmost arm of the Mediterranean Sea, the plastic case had floated ashore by that route Continue reading →