Tag Archives: Marriage

I’m worried about the technical disqualification of your intended. And I call it technical disqualification because that’s what it is. Did you say your mum is asking you not to marry her just because she’s from another part of the country? Just because she belongs to another tribe, that’s the basis of the disqualification?! Most interesting! As it is, your matrimonial choice is geographically restricted. You’re disqualified from taking a wife from 90% of the ethnic landmass of your country. And of the remaining 10%, only 6% is matrimonially arable. Essentially what your mum is saying is, you can’t look farther than your state of origin for wife. Continue reading →

Dear Jil,

Come on! I’m sure you know better than this. Come on! This guy’s going to make you cry with his infidelity. He’s a serial womanizer with a transit harem disposition. A guy says to you, you’re my “main chick” and you’re still asking if you should stay or quit the relationship! If you’re the main chick, it means there are subsidiary chicks. Your boyfriend is a public liability company (PLC). He has many shareholders. Are you so desperate for a relationship you’ll allow a guy to appellate you with ignominiousness? Perhaps in a perverse sort of way being called a main chick makes you feel special. You’re the main the main! But that’s not the kind of special you want, not if you want a wholesome relationship. The guy is taking you for granted and you’re consoling yourself with nonsense.  Continue reading →

My dear Jack, what kind of partner should you desire in marriage? What type of marriage? I’d say pray for someone who wants you, who’ll be so identified with you she’s you. Two people, one life.  Continue reading →

My dear Jil, here are three common errors concerning marriage. I hope you avoid them.

The first error is the myth of marriage as a difficult thing – that it’s MEANT to be difficult. It’s a lie. That lie has been passed on from generation to generation. It’s gained credence and gathered moss with each passing. The very existence of very happy marriages assaults the veracity of this myth. Don’t adopt it as a philosophy. The myth persists because no one questioned its premises Continue reading →

My dear Jack,

let me explain the concept of beauty to you. It’s important you grasp it to avoid a wrong judgment call on the choice of marriage partner. Continue reading →

My dear Jil, let me simplify things for you. Let me concretise the basic parameters of choice for you. Seems you are not getting it. Perhaps it’s because it’s in prose form. Let’s do an exercise. This should help.  Continue reading →

My dear Jack,

This virginity thing. It seems a big issue for you. And it’s generating awkward contradictions in you. It’s the hidden reason you’re struggling with your emotions. You’re conflicted inside because you know you have no standing. Continue reading →

Dear Jil, this marriage thing seems so simple and straightforward. But we somehow manage to complicate it. We complicate marriage with our willfulness, our stubbornness, and ignorance. Continue reading →

My dear Jack, if you don’t want the truth don’t ask me for advice. I’ve told you money is important in marriage. A lack of money can break a marriage. And where it doesn’t it can do irreparable damage. It will reconfigure the relationship between you and your wife. It’s why I tell young men not to go into marriage without a job. You’re going to put enormous strain on the marriage. No matter how much you love each other, when there’s no money the union will be pressured. Continue reading →

Dear Jil, I’ll advice you quit nagging your husband. You’re going to turn him completely off you. Men can’t handle nagging. It’s emotionally and psychologically debilitating to them, and very disturbing. I’ve told you, you need to understand the male psyche. It’s a knowledge investment you ought to make. You’re married to one. Nagging is a grave irritability to men. It’s like the constant dripping of water from the faucet on a tin roof. Note that Solomon likens a quarrelsome woman to same constant dripping of water. And so your husband sees you as troublesome and quarrelsome, just because you nag! Continue reading →