Tag Archives: Marriage

My dear Jil, I’m not sure you got what he’s trying to say. I think both of you are lost in translation. And things get further lost in translation as we try to narrate marital problems to third parties. The reason is simple. Every time we try to relate issues in a marriage to a third party we do so with an objective. We relay problems in marriage to third parties with a view to achieving vindication. And that objective colours the truth. Our objective makes us unobjective however we try. Why Solomon said every story sounds true until you hear the other side. It means we downplay some things and omit salient facts. Continue reading →

Dear Jack, I don’t think you should be under any illusions concerning your girlfriend even though you’re in love with her. You’ve got to come to terms with the facts of your partner, the reality concerning her. That you deny facts about your partner won’t make them go away. Closing one eye and looking at life with one finger right in front of the other eye presents an eliminated slice of reality. Continue reading →

Dear Jack, you can’t possibly be thinking of divorce barely two months into marriage. What do you think marriage is!
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Dear Jack, when I visited him, he spoke about puttering around, looking for remote control of the air-conditioning unit. She doesn’t know this, he said, but each time she leaves for work before him, he has to search for so many things. And she never puts off her side-lamp when she leaves for work. She leaves it on. He switches off the appliance. Continue reading →

My dear Jil, what I’m going to say in this letter may not go down well in certain circles, but you know me… Continue reading →

My dear Jil,

Happy New Year and how are you! I do hope you had a nice vacation. Mine was wonderful as you can see from the pictures I posted. Had a wonderful time with my family. My expectations are high for this year. I hope you’ve ramped up yours too. Without desire we cannot attain. Continue reading →

‘Tis that season again. The season of Christmas. It’s the season of love and joy, and goodwill to all men. What I want to do in this letter is bring to your remembrance some of the things we shared in the course of the year. I do hope you’ve bought the gift for your wife. Make it something special for her. Well, here are the nuggets from our discussions this year. Enjoy!
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Dear Jil,

‘Tis that season again. The season of Christmas. It’s the season of love and joy, and goodwill to all men. What I want to do in this letter is bring to your remembrance some of the things we shared in the course of the year. I do hope you’ve bought the gift for your husband. Make it something special for him. Well, here are the nuggets from our discussions this year. Enjoy! Continue reading →

Dear Jil,

Now this is new to me: You have an assistant boyfriend?! Sounds like football club set up… you know, coach and assistant coach! There’s your main boyfriend. And there’s this other guy you’re side-dating, secretly. So you have a primary relationship and a secondary relationship. Sex is not involved in the secondary relationship. Continue reading →