Tag Archives: Sex

[Dear Jack, no, your mum shouldn’t have brought spiritist water for your wife to medicate upon! Surely, you don’t expect your wife to drink such. Would you take substance from an unknown and unapproved source? Your wife has no knowledge of the origin of this “spiritual water”. Neither is she privy to its solutes or composites. Not to talk of its hygiene standard. Even its spiritual provenance requires verification. Continue reading →

Jack, something is bothering you and you need to discuss whatever it is with your wife. You can’t be having irregular sex with your wife at wide intervals and not expect her to wonder why. It’s usually the men who complain of not enough sex but in your instance it’s your wife complaining. You’re away from town on your job all week, sometimes all month. That’s your life as an oil-rig engineer. It makes sense therefore that when you come home, it will be a fun-filled and sexually fulfilling weekend. But the sex in your marriage is almost quarterly now, like a corporate account. That can’t bode well for a young marriage. Continue reading →

Dear Jil, let me tell you about Titi Lailai. She was a lovely girl, a very kind person. Her kindness transcended her beauty. That kindness sometimes came in little packages – like the unforgettable pocket-sized transistor radio she bought her cousin. The radio- black and yellow, reminds one of her complexion – what she is, what she’s not. She’s dark in complexion. She bought a red and black for her uncle – her adopted father. Her life is littered with such little gestures of kindness.

Continue reading →

My dear Jil, I’d have thought by now you’d know better than to produce a sex tape. There are too many instances of sex tape gone viral that someone should have learnt by now. Whatever the wonderful intent of Kim Kardashian about her sex tape I doubt if she contemplated a vengeful Ray J. When it comes to sex tape there is always the possibility of prosecution of malice or revenge by a former lover.

Continue reading →

Dear Jil, seems your boyfriend is into kinky sex; he’s you know 50 Shades of Grey. The demands he’s making on you seems to point in that direction. He has a fetishism for hair and smell, that’s why he’s making those demands. He gets offended if you shave any part of you, you say and when you’re together he likes to smell “you”.

Continue reading →

My dear Jil, you married a young man in his prime. His sexual demands are in consonance with his age. It is not for nothing that the God who created the sexes says couples should not deny each other sex. I suspect that was coded more for the benefit of the man than the woman, and you’ll see why.

Continue reading →

Dear Jil,Thank you for your mail. And I appreciate your kind compliments. Yes, my letters are REAL!

Now in your mail you stated that you subscribe to the Biblical injunction of no premarital sex. That is okay even if you’re judged prude or old fashioned. It’s your choice and you should never apologise for your values. In view of your upcoming nuptials however (it’s barely a month away), you do need to know how to fulfill your sexual marital obligation. Sex is a knowledge program. It’s why we call it carnal knowledge. Even the Bible refers to sex as knowledge. Copulation is recorded as a “knowing” in several passages. One of such instances is Genesis 4.1: “Adam knew Eve his wife”. It’s referring to coition. A more modern translation would read “Adam had sex with Eve his wife”. So sex is not “unholy”. God created the biological implements of sex – conceptualised copulation for marriage.

Continue reading →

Continue reading →

Dear LA,

A potential suitor recently asked why I wasn’t married. It was a loaded question and it came with a full set of assumptions.

Continue reading →