Dear Jil, to be honest with you, you’re in a quandary. Dating a separated man is tricky. It can go either way. There’s a probability it may lead to marriage, a probability; but there’s also the probability he may return to his wife. Continue reading
Dear Jil, to be honest with you, you’re in a quandary. Dating a separated man is tricky. It can go either way. There’s a probability it may lead to marriage, a probability; but there’s also the probability he may return to his wife. Continue reading
My dear Jil, can’t you see we’re all ridden with faults and imperfections? In classical expressionism, we’re all fallen short of God’s glorious standard. We’re in effect substandard messed up products. There’s no human without obvious and painful faults. You’re full of faults, he’s full of faults. Therefore a good relationship is not one in which parties are perfect but one in which parties are accommodating. Continue reading
My dear Jil, you know I’ve always expressed my doubts about your money-denominated relationship. Your marriage is now at an impasse, and if you don’t make a radical shift in values and philosophy, it will unravel. The record of your marriage almost reads like a bank ledger. The marriage is totally transactional. It’s all about who bought what, who didn’t buy what, who’s owing whom and who, what’s outstanding… That doesn’t feel like marriage. It sounds like commerce – marital commerce. Continue reading
My dear Jil, let me tell you a story about two people who could have been. (We are going a bit deep in this letter. We’re going to explore the ventricles of the human heart). I want you to understand the workings of why we do what we do in a relationship, what motivates our actions. More often than not we’re not aware of these things, the effect of them. We’re too focused on ourselves. Continue reading
This Valentine edition of #Letr2Jil is dedicated to my beautiful Jil, my wife, my soul mate and one true love!
He turned to CHAPTER 4 of the book, flipped the page forth, and then back, and began to read:
My very own Jil, I sat up in the middle of the night watching you sleep, my heart a-wonder. I looked at your face. Continue reading
My dear Jil, just as we self-diagnose basic ailments like headache, I believe we should diagnose ourselves emotionally. Oh yes, there’s such a thing as emotional ailment. We get emotionally ill for example from being jilted. Continue reading
My dear Jil, I’ve taken time to think about it, you know, just think through. I surmise the most important thing in a relationship is sincerity. It’s the basis of trust. Once you remove sincerity from a relationship everything becomes contrived, everything becomes manipulative. Continue reading
My dear Jil, you can’t continue this way. You’re going to hurt yourself and hurt those who love you. You have pain and anger. The reality of life is that we all run the risk of being hurt in a relationship. It’s an inherent risk Continue reading
My dear Jil, it’s very early in the year and I think it’s important to set a tone for the year, it’s young. By now of course you would have discovered that resolutions don’t seem to work. It’s not because resolutions are a bad idea, it’s just that they’re structurally deficient and underpowered. They depend too much on human will but fail to account for counter-wills. Willfulness, selfishness and self-centeredness overwrite resolutions. Without resolving those, resolutions can’t work. Continue reading